Myths and Facts

The Myths relating to domestic abuse

Minimising, avoiding, and explaining domestic abuse patterns, is what the victim will do, this will happen for many reasons, it could be shame/guilt/embarrassment, the excuses being made for the perpetrators behaviour, when in reality the only person to blame is the ABUSER.

Common Myths and Facts about domestic abuse

  • Myth 1 - She would leave if it was that bad.

    How many times have we heard this, and yes from people who have never walked in the victims shoes, there are a list of reasons why a women chooses to stay: Children/ Finances/ Immigration/ Housing qualifications/ Income support/ not to mention frightened/ controlled, leaving an abusive relationship is an individual journey and this takes time.

  • Myth 2 – If you were abused as a child you become an abuser.

    There are many cases of children being brought up in a abusive environment, this however does not create an abuser, as abuse is a choice, so the abuser takes full responsibility.

  • Myth 3 - Domestic abuse only happens to women in low income families.

    Domestic abuse can happen to any women, it does not matter what profession you are in, your financial situation, it does not care for you culture, ethnic or social background.

  • Myth 4 - Alcohol, drugs and mental health make people abuse.

    Abuse is a choice. Alcohol, drugs and mental health may exacerbate an already abusive relationship, but none of these make abusers unless it's a choice.

  • Myth 5 - Domestic abuse is no ones business.

    Domestic abuse is a crime, and it happens to countless victims daily, it is all of ours business, it is a huge social issue with at times fatalities.

  • Myth 6 - They are lucky to have them.

    To the outside world your life is perfection, a home, family, the doting partner who financially supports, however behind closed doors the picture is very different.

    “How lucky you have them to look after you” what about making your own choices regarding your life.

  • Myth 7 - Some women deserve to be abused.

    Partners will victim blame stating “You made me do it, if you had just done the dishes I wouldn't have gone mad”, no one deserves to be abused.

  • Fact 1

    1 in 4 women are killed by an abusive partner or ex every 5 days days in England and Wales.

  • Fact 2

    It takes on average 7 attempts before a victim is able to leave for good.

  • Fact 3

    Domestic abuse can lead women to suicide, it is estimated that around three women a week complete suicide as a result of domestic abuse.

  • Fact 4

    Domestic abuse heightens during or after pregnancy, around 20% of women who seek safe house accommodation in England and Wales are pregnant or recently given birth.

  • Fact 5

    The police in England and Wales receive a domestic abuse related call every 30 seconds, yet less the 24% of domestic abuse crime is reported to the police.

  • Fact 6

    1 in 4 women women in England and Wales will experience domestic abuse in their lifetime.

  • Fact 7

    Domestic abuse is linked to depression and homelessness, women who experience domestic abuse are twice as likely to experience depression, and 40% of homeless women state domestic abuse as a contributing factor to being homeless. (England and Wales)

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